Oh, Joseph. He is one of the smartest kids that I know. His reading AND his comprehension are past the high school level, his memory is insanely accurate, and his ability to make sense out of what he's learned is far above his years. Far above.
BUT...
he does lots of knuckle-headed stuff and he does lots of destructive stuff. Oh you know, catching frogs and putting them in the van pockets until they die, taking my decorations from the house and filling them with water FOR NO REASON, cutting the mesh lining out of his BRAND NEW shoes, letting a mouse literally ROT in his bookbag, rubbing deodorant all over his brother's bed, carving hieroglyphics into my solid wood furniture, dumping medications down the toilet, shoving the girls' lotion bottles full of tissues...these are the easy stories. I could go on for days with stories that would blow you out of the water. Stories I can only laugh at now because I'm surprised that we all lived to tell about it.
All that being said, the aforementioned knuckle-headed acts have earned Joseph many nights (and days) writing pages out of the Bible. Actually, writing many pages out of the Bible (and likely memorizing them while he does).
So, why is this important? It helps you understand Joseph and understand my point in writing this blog.
Joseph accepted Christ at school last week. That's a big deal. Anytime that anyone accepts Christ, it's a big deal. Angels are rejoicing, friends and family are rejoicing, I am rejoicing. The Lord is rejoicing. It's an all around party in heaven and on Earth.
While everyone's salvation is a wonderfully special time and the best decision anyone could ever make - Joseph's salvation is a huge deal for me. Of my six children I have seen five of them come to Christ. My heart was overjoyed with each and every single one but Joseph's was sweeter to my heart and more soothing to my soul than the others.
The very day Joseph moved in with us we began praying daily for him and daily with him, as we do with all our children. We have never stopped and never will. The very day Joseph moved in with us we started telling him how much we love him. We have never stopped and we never will. The very day Joseph moved in with us we started telling him how much Jesus loves him. We have never stopped and we never will.
We kept telling him of this Jesus guy and how much He loves Joseph. That no matter what, Jesus loves him. That no matter what, he can trust Jesus. That Jesus cares about every single thing that he does or doesn't do. That Jesus only has his best interest at heart.
So why did it take so long for Joseph to believe what we were telling him? Well, because he didn't trust us for a very long time. So why did it take so long for Joseph to believe what Jesus was telling him? Well, because he didn't trust Jesus for a very long time.
Joseph moved 18 times before joining our family. His move to our home was his 19th placement...and he was six years old. Folks, that's a big deal. He didn't move that many times because he was an easy child. He was moved that many times because he was a difficult child (TOTALLY not his fault but that's another story). The first six years of his life were spent being let down by adults he should have been able to trust. By adults who told him that they loved him, by adults that told him that he wouldn't have to move again, by adults who were supposed to meet his daily basic needs, by adults he called "mom" and "dad." The first six years of his life were spent forming relationships with kids that he thought were or would be his brothers and sisters. For the first six years of his life Joseph learned that adults...and people...weren't to be trusted.
I fully believe that is why we have had so many difficult seasons with Joseph. By this point in game, we can foresee them coming and just ride them out. We pass out the consequences and love him anyway he and dutifully fulfills his consequences and loves us anyway. Why would Jordan and I be any different than the rest of the adults in his life? Why should he trust us when we have said the same thing that every other adult in his life has told him? Why would Jesus be any different than the rest of the adults in Joseph's life? Why should he trust Jesus when Jesus has told him the same thing that every other adult in his life has told him?
Despite what anyone may think, I know in my heart that Joseph's seasons of outbursts were to test Jordan and I..and to test this Jesus that we speak of so much. Would we still love Joseph if he acted in the most undesirable ways? Would we keep our promise to him that we'll always love him no matter what? Would we still keep him as our son despite some of the things he has done? But more importantly, would we keep our promise to Jesus that we would love him no matter what? Would Jesus keep his promise to Joseph that he would love him no matter what?
Joseph knows every story in the Bible. That's not an exaggeration. He can recall scripture references, he knows nearly all the words in red, he has memorized many large chunks of scripture. He's well versed when it comes to the Bible. He knows the life of Jesus inside and out (likely because he's written 100 times). In his head he knows (and has known for four years) that Jesus loves him. He's read of what Jesus did, can do, and will do. He just had to believe it and trust. Joseph was too smart to "just believe." He knew what "just believing" could do to a person. After all, "just believing" got him hurt many, many times before. By the time Joseph came to us he knew to stop "just believing" and figure things out on his own.
After four years, I can count on one hand how many adults Joseph actually trusts. Four. He fully trusts four adults. But now he trusts Jesus, too. This is because of the love that has been poured onto and into him by us, our family, our friends, and his school. The love of Jesus was made real to Joseph. For four years the adults in our life showed the love of Jesus to Joseph over and over again. I hope and pray that since he's now decided to trust Jesus that he'll begin to fully trust the other adults in his life too. I hope and pray that one day he can be the hands and feet of Jesus and love on folks just like him. Folks who needed to tangibly see and feel the love of Jesus through those who already love Him and trust Him. Folks that won't give up on others because they know that Jesus will never give up on them.
"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we night live through Him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. "
- 1 John 4: 7-12
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