All Settled

Goodness, friends, it's been too long.  All I can say is:  What a journey!  These last 8 weeks (yes, our children have been here for 8 weeks already as of this weekend) have absolutely flown by in the blink of an eye.  I'm not quite sure where to start with this update but I'll do my best to re-cap.

1.  The children moved in April 16.

  **Thank you to everyone for all your love, support, dinners, donations, phone calls, emails, etc.  I have finally finished all my thank you notes and they are going in the mail tomorrow.  This is truly a small miracle in itself :)

2.  Jordan was commissioned on May 13 and we had a weekend-long bash celebrating with family and friends.

**Thank you to all who came to the different events of that weekend.  Those blasted thank you notes are next on my list (I'm now wishing I had children who could write something other than their name...haha)

3.  We moved out of our home in State College (we are sad about this - we LOVE the town, the people, the church, our neighbors, etc) on May 27.

**Thank you go all who helped move us out of the little shoe box that we called home.

4.  We stayed with  my parents for the entire next week and visited with family and friends in Harrisburg.

**Thanks Mom and Dad for allowing your house to be invaded for a week...and for footing the grocery bill for 6 extra people! (and sorry, Dad, for all the little toys your poor feet stepped on that your poor eyes couldn't see!)

5.  June 4 we moved to Quantico, VA into a spacious home on a lovely piece of land that fits the seven of us beautifully (we always include Brookie in our count!)

**Thank you to everyone for your help moving us into our  new home and helping us with dinners, unpacking, and kid-entertaining.

As of today, every box is unpacked, every closet and shelf is organized, and my house is cleaned from top to bottom.  I am looking forward to my days now.  I can slow down a bit, enjoy my kids a little more, and really start living life a bit better.  Since the day we found out we were getting the children, only 10 weeks ago, I felt like I have been packing and unpacking every day since.  I'm glad that is over and I am glad we are settled.  

So, before I post some cute pictures of my babies, I'll get to the meat.  An important court hearing was held this past Thursday and Friday that will ultimately determine our children's future.  The judge delayed making a decision at this time.  From what we understand it could take a few weeks up to a few months for us to receive this decision.  To be quite honest with you, I haven't allowed myself to be affected by this.  I am very ashamed to admit this but feel that I need to:  the thought of these children ever leaving my side, let alone my home is unbearable to me.  I  have guarded my heart (not that way God intended me to guard it in Proverbs 4:23) by putting up my defenses.  It deeply saddens me to admit that the closest I got to praying for this was "Dear God, I can't even think about this so I'm not going to pray about -just protect my babies."  You see, the more I would even begin to think about it the more my body would ache and I would sense my mood going sour.  Perhaps it's a good thing I was so busy unpacking and organizing...perhaps it wasn't.  Regardless, I do regret not staying on my knees every minute of those entire days.  But I do know that my God understands my heart and loves me inspite of my selfishness.  I was only protecting my own feelings and not doing what I should have (this is NOT an excuse!).  But I also know that my God is watching out for my babies and has great plans for them.  I'm stuck in this small story in our small life (but thankfully much bigger home) and cannot see His grand picture (as I refer back to my previous post about the art picture and say to myself "Practice what you preach, missy.")

Please know that the judge not making a decision is NOT necessarily a bad thing.  Jordan and I were just hoping for good news right away.  From what we understand it is common for judges in these types of cases to take some time to make a decision.  We should know more this week after we talk to various caseworkers.  I am glad, though, that I have a second chance to go where I need to go - on my knees.  You can bet the farm that I've learned my lesson.  Regret hurts a lot more than a sad heart.  But, enough of that.  Please just pray for us.  Pray for discernment for the judge.  Pray for the protection of my babies.  Pray for the future of my babies.  I know many of you got to meet them and I know I am biased, but they sure are a great bunch of kids.

Now, for the happy stuff:  PICTURES!

They LOVE putting coins in their animal banks...mostly because they make noise when you do!

My beautiful butterfly - She LOVES dress-up, make-up, and grown-ups!

Water Baby - Don't let her fool you with those innocent eyes!

Our son, the fish.  This child can't get enough of the outside.  He loves all sports and has a new love of swimming.

My "Great Pretender" - This child has an imagination like none other.  She is ALWAYS creating or making something.

A trip to Chocolate World

Brooke has gracefully resigned herself to being the horse, the cat, the dog, the baby, the dress-up  mannequin, etc. 

Tractor rides with Uncle Buddy - don't worry, the blade is OFF

Taking a rest on our walk (approx 20 yards from our front door)

The Ames

Practicing in Grammy's tanbark for the real sand at the beach this summer.

At Jon's Commissioning with the girls - our poor buddy had to miss this since he was at school - bummer!

Jordan's Commissioning

That is just a small glimpse of our life in the past 8 weeks.  Things sure are different.  I always was a type A personality - you all know that.  At first I tried to be what I like to call "Type A 1/2" when the kids came but that didn't work.  Both myself and my kids thrive on schedule and routine.  We have certain rituals, rules, and ways that just don't change or we get ourselves out of sorts.  In my head (a scary place at times) I tell myself this is normal.  After all, even though my kids are older, I am still a new mother and we've only had 2 months together.  Everyday I am still learning about their personalities, likes, dislikes, interests, etc.  If none of us have to worry about what is going to come next in our day or what is expected of us at certain times then we all can spend that extra energy still getting to know each other.  Little things pop up all the time that we just didn't have time to cover in only 8 very busy weeks.  For instance just tonight my  5 year old asked me "Mom, when can we cuddle?"  I said "cuddle, what do you  mean?"  She said, "You know, you hold me under the covers and just hug and read stories."  I had NO IDEA this child ever desired anything like this...or when my seven year old asked me why I don't buy him pineapples to eat...or when my three year old  told me she hates the socks that don't fold down...or when my 2 year old after 7 weeks of putting her to bed with music on at nap finally said in her little baby voice "Mommy, turn that off."  Every day since I have asked her if she wants music and she says "No music." (I still cringe at this - I can't imagine a child of mine not wanting to listen to music!)  All these little things that every good mother knows, I am still learning.  And I intend to have a lifetime to do it.

We can't thank you all enough for what you've each meant to us.  I'll never stop thanking you all for helping make this miracle happen.